In the April issue of Elysian Fields, we introduced a new program at PVE. This incredible opportunity was a chance for residents and management employees to work closely together. The “Take Your Resident to Work Day” program would have paired residents with managers for enlightening job shadowing experiences had it not been a great April Fools Day prank dreamed up by the Elysian Fields staff!
Our literary/comedy team first dreamed up real-world job descriptions for two employees: our CFO and marketing director. I’ll bet you didn’t know that our CFO Neil Calhoun has the following duties (as imagined by our pranksters) on his daily to-do list:
- Read Wall Street Journal daily to learn fiduciary terms that will confuse residents
- Prepare sufficiently obfuscating reports to explain multi-thousand dollar purchases
- Understand difference between profit and loss
- Count beans efficiently and accurately
Next up was marketing director Jane Walker who, according to the jokester committee, has to be able to:
- Drive a golf cart around a cul de sac without prospective residents falling off
- Smile incessantly no matter how banal the conversation
- Assure new residents that a two-bedroom apartment actually has 4,000 square feet of usable space
- Discern fine wine from Bakersfield Basement Jug Wine
Several residents joined in on the fun applying for the job shadowing experiences with their own hilarious qualifications including:
- “When I heard you were a pre-fab truss expert I knew that we were kindred souls.”
- “I can really hold my liquor and would be a terrific asset at Ambassador meetings and New Resident Receptions.”
It was quite the April Fools gag and a great creative exercise for our Elysian Fields writers, too. We hope you enjoyed the fun, too!